i hope everyone likes me

me in my brain, constantly & forever (via valerie2776)

  • Jesus: Love thy neighbor as thyself.
  • People: What if they’re gay?
  • Jesus: Did I fucking stutter?
validx2:

lmao

If you could go anywhere in the world right now would it be to a “where” or to a “who”?

(via unbekanntesmeer)

Definitely to a who.

(via leraksjin)

(Source: love-summer-love33)

operameister:

thisismythanksgivingurl-gobble:

agentgreenfishy:

poselikeateam:

fuck-i-just:

Next time a blocked number calls you answer like this: “Jim’s whore house. You got the dough, we got the hoe.”

Why does this not have any notes?

lol no “Nashville sperm bank, you squeeze it we freeze it. how may I help you?”

“Henderson’s Morgue, you stab em, we slab em, this is Eight Ball speaking.”

“Texas crematorium you kill ‘em we grill ‘em how can I direct your call?”

"Thank you for calling itty bitty titty committee, this is Kitty, how can I help you with your itty bitty titties?"

full-of-hell:

Lol Bart lurkin

Reblogging for Bart